What good fortune did chance bestow upon me today? For some reason I stumbled upon Google News’s election section, or something. I don’t know how I ended up there but after leaving the tab open for at least three hours, I actually skimmed its contents. And I saw something wonderful.
There you have it. Quantitative proof that Willard “Mick” Romney is the Antichrist or Man of Sin, whose coming was foretold most notably in Paul’s Second Epistle to the Thessalonians.
Though a compelling case has been made that Ronald Wilson Reagan was indeed the Antichrist, by virtue of his first, middle and last names each having six letters (which adds up to 666 and not 18, you idiot), we find this delegate projection done by the fine people of the Associated Press to be far more convincing.
So, uh, is Rick Santorum president yet?
You loved reading this. Your friends probably won’t. Annoy them with it anyway.
