Well, it’s the end of April, so you know what that means: the Kansas City Royals have been mathematically eliminated from postseason play. Also, the White House Correspondents’ Dinner happened.
If we were a real and/or good political blog, we might have live-tweeted it, but since we lack neither the motivation nor a TV that receives C-SPAN live, that live-tweeting didn’t happen. Sorry; we were too busy being mean to a really shitty local marketing firm.
Our dog-eating Kenyan President Barry Soetoro was on fire tonight, telling a lot of jokes that I’m sure his right-wing detractors will spend the next 6 months taking out of context as proof that he loves socialism and the taste of supple Golden Retriever flesh.
Jimmy Kimmel followed. I don’t even have jokes. It was a solid 45 minutes of entertainment. Even the Huffington Post (I refuse to italicize your name, you gigantic piece of web feces) got shit on a little bit. I was in heaven.
Question: how many Republicans will rake the president over the coals for making jokes this evening instead of focusing his efforts on solving gasoline? Answer: all of them.
No, I’m not stupid, I meant “solving gasoline.” It’s a really bad joke. Fuck you, don’t judge me.